Has the swine flu found you?

I'm in the UK and like most of the world we are dealing with the outbreak of swine flu.

Swine flu has become so wide spread I'm guessing most of you will know at least on person that has become ill with this new flu. Following the media coverage of the out break that has made many people panic about about whats to come. Yes they say the flu has now taken lives of healthy people with no under lying health conditions. No wonder the world is becoming more and more scared of catching the flu. However many people have got swine flu and recovered in a speedy none complicated fashion. I know of a few friends that have in fact coped well with the flu. I have been told by others it seems no worse then our everyday seasonal flu. But what do you do if you are in the higher risk groups of developing complications if contaminated with the flu. How are these people coping with the outbreak of Swine flu?

Well I'm a 27 year old normally fit and healthy young woman! The only thing is I'm almost 25 weeks pregnant and I'm heading into my 3rd trimester of pregnancy. So yes I myself do fall into that higher risk group! Yes I do worry for no one wants to get sick and have the added risk of complications with their pregnancy and unborn child. I'm also scared my two young children will catch the virus and I wont be able to care for them. I heard on the news the other night that the vaccination should be ready by October. I also hear that pregnant woman are high up on the list to receive it. Well at least that's something.

I just hope for everybody sake that swine flu is not as bad as the media like to make out!

ANTENATAL DEPRESSION

Depression is something really hard to bear but when pregnant it seems a whole lot worse. I'm 14 weeks pregnant and felling pretty good right now, But this wasn't the case a few weeks back. I wouldn't go as far to say I was really depressed but god I was somewhere close to it. As I wrote in my last post women today seem to have trouble adjusting to a changing body shape whatever the reason. Being pregnant is no exception! With this, raging hormones, tiredness and discomfort it's no surprise pregnant women become that little bit moody or sadly depressed. I have gained weight at lighting speed and hated the fact my clothing was tight. Being a person that has suffered from bloats of depression I hated felling down and luckily I snapped out of the darkness. But what happens to those woman that don't? Yes we have all heard of postnatal depression but how often do we hear about Antenatal depression? Yes it's normal to fell tired and run down, but it's not normal to be like this all the time! if you have been having trouble sleeping, been felling down, your eating habits are different and your pregnant then you could be suffering from antenatal depression making it more then likely you will develop postnatal depression so seek expect advice asap. I found that most of my first trimester I was extra tired, moody and tearful but I had good days. Now that I'm in the early stages of my second trimester I'm already felling much better. 

WOMEN AND SIZE

Today us as women are so completely obsessed with our weight. It's sad but so very true, because yes I'm just as bad, I'm one of them many obsessed women. It's so sad that many of us girls fell the need to be a certain weight before we are comfortable, even then we are not happy. Are we ever happy with the way we look ?

The reason I find myself writing this is because of a recent conversation with a close friend of mine. You see she has a friend that yes I know but not extremely well. She is around 30 weeks pregnant. She doesn't look like she is reason being is because she has an eating disorder. Yes I understand this because I myself went through this in my teens when my OCD was at it's worse. But god it makes me so angry as I recently lost a baby at 11 weeks pregnant. I would of been 33 weeks now, just 3 weeks a head of her :(

I look at young girls today and think god what chance have they got? Some girls are so scared of the word fat! And why? Because that's the way it is today. THIN IS IN AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN. As a woman we have more control, but still it's hard. WHY CAN'T WE JUST LOVE OURSELVES ?  My daughter is six and I hope she never fells that way. I have heard that girls this young are already worrying about there size. I'm forever telling my princess she is gorgeous, because she is:)

Will women ever win the battle ?

DO YOU HAVE OCD

I have come up with a fantastic idea!

Every Month I interview somebody over at A boy With Aspergers. As most know this is another of my blogs. All the interviews are autism related, and boy are they becoming a hit. So I fault hay lets do something like that over here. My plan is to find someone to interview each and every month as a blog feature. So my first interview will be on the topic of OCD. Then maybe the next panic disorders. So if your Interested then leave a comment. Wanna read some autism related interviews or take part in one ( No spaces left to July ) Then pop yourself over to A boy with Aspergers and see what all the fuss is about. 

Will Inform readers of the upcoming interview on OCD in the next coming weeks.

SCARED OF DEATH

Are you scared of dieing ?

Does the very word make you freak ?

Death used to be one of my biggest fears, I suppose it still is. Death is something my OCD was wrapped around. I would make myself check and count by using the feared DEATH. How ? Simple! In my wacky head would come the feared if you do not get up and check that the cooker is off or the telly is unplugged then something bad will happen to someone you love ( Something bad would often mean death ) This used to send me crazy, for someone who has never battled OCD this may sound crazy, silly, mad and more. But if you have lived in my world of OCD, Fear and Panic I'm guessing you somehow understand. As I have said many times before things are better these days, meaning better then my teenage years when I would spend the nights up and down out of bed counting plug sockets and then unplugging my mothers freezer resulting in her weeks food shopping ending up in the bin ( not a happy mummy ) But of late I have had an attack of the OCD maybe I'm stress who knows I'm just battling the monster the best way I know. The mind is a powerful tool, Lets just remember it's ours so we can control it if we really want to.

RETURN OF THE OCD

Lately my life has been a little crazy!

It's when life is this way that danger begins. Yes the monster known to me as OCD has a horrible habit of baring it's ugly self. It's not to bad right now but it's there and that makes me panic. My life long battle with the disorder is something I used to hide in shame, but not anymore! I know I'm not mad or crazy ( OK SOME MAY NOT AGREE ) OCD is just one of them mind games that a lot of us play from time to time. I think that OCD is within a small part of all of  us. It's just how we perceive it, do we let it take over, take control? I'm just one of those many people that find it extremely difficult to ignore what is going on in my mind. I stress, stress some more, worry, worry some more then bang HELLO MRS OCD. Thing is I'm kind of worrying about stuff that I really can't control, although I wish I could these situations are really out of my hands and in the hands of god. I need to learn to kick back, relax and let life run it's course! but come on easier said then done. 

INSIDE THE MIND OF A BULLY

Bullying a hard but very common word, heard by many, affecting so many, done by many!

Bullying is something that sadly affects all kinds of people young and old. Many children fear bullying from peers every single day. But it's not only children that face the daily fears of a bully. Adults of all kinds also face the fear of a bully. There is bullying in the school, collage, uni, workplace, streets, home, EVERYWHERE! We come across it everyday, we read about it, see, it and sadly many of you reading this post may off even dealt with it.

Reason for this post ? My 8 year old son that has Asperger's has become a victim of a bully! Yesterday I wrote the post Aspergers and bullying on my blog A boy with Asperger's. I needed to vent my Anger at what was happening and share with others my felling on bullying and how this bully had made me fell. It's hard for the child, harder still if that child is not good with social skills. My sons tears and fears made an anger boil within me, one I can honestly say I have never felt. We all say ( well many do ) children will be children. NO I DISAGREE! MY CHILD WILL NOT BE A BULLY!

 I have had many parents and even sadder teachers use this phrase when referring to a bully. I think as a parent we have to show our children that bullying is a NO NO. I drum into my children's heads that inflecting fear on another person is a horrible thing to do. My son has been known to make comments that are seen as sometimes rude to others. But this is something beyond my control as this is something that happens with a child on the spectrum of autism. This is why my son will  at times discover that this has lead him into trouble with children and adults. I try to teach him skills on communication on a daily basis. He will now sometimes count to ten before speaking his opinion.

 Bullying is in some way as hard for the parent as it is the child. As my child was HIT by this bully ( more then once ) I really wanted my son to march down there and hit him back. Of course this did not happen. I know two wrongs don't make a right and as a parent hitting is something I teach my children not to do. But when you discover your child's been hurt by fist as well as words you are greeted with anger that almost or does bring tears to your eyes.

Is it true that most bullies are really acting in this way in order to suppress a frustration of something not right in their own life's. Most bullies are weak! I believe this to be true. When there is a bully in a relationship ( The controlling partner or abuser ) you will find that this person has great insecurities of there own, maybe from past relationships or they were the victims of a bully themselves. When the partner in a relationship is bullying their loved one it's not uncommon that that person is unaware of themselves being seen as a bully and when told they are likely to be upset and shocked that you could even suggested such a thing.

I have been told by an ex bully that some bullies become addicted to the felling of power that they gain over there victims. That's why there seems to be a number of bullies found within the work place today. How many people have you heard about that have had to step down from their jobs as the result of being the bosses victim. 

The mind of a bully is a somewhat puzzling affair! Do they have felling of guilt or not ? Is it powerful to hold ones fear, to control it in which ever way they want. Enjoy intimidating offers. I don't know! Reason I'm no bully. But if you are be sure to comment and share what it's like in the mind of a bully.

Today Im going to be me.

We spend much of our life's tyring to better ourselves, impress someone or change something. I don't care who says "Well I don't" Because whoever you are you know that there has been a time, point in your life that you have done this. Maybe it was when you was a teen ( we all did this as teenagers ) or maybe it was that last job interview you had. COME ON DO WE ALL SPEAK AS POSH AS WE DID WHEN METING THE NEW BOSS? Can you see what I'm saying? I find as we grow older into an adult we begin to think sod it if they can't except me as I am then bad luck, walk away. This statement really reveres to relationships ( well for me it does and if you think about it harder you will probably find it does you to! ) When we first meet that oh so special person that gives us the butterflies we do indeed act in a different way. WELL TO AN EXTENT! We never really show the real complete me do we ? That will always come with time. Half the time we don't even know we are doing it. That's why it's called getting to now someone, or people say do you know the real he/she ? It's just the way us as humans are. I love it when you hear someone say "OMG he wasn't like that when I meet him or I would of run a mile!" News flash! Of course he didn't walk around saying five years down the line i will show you the prick in me! ( that sounded wrong and some what rude lol ) Also we need to remember with each and every stage in life we change, not completely but to some degree we change!  I used to like partying every weekend and with it I would become totally drunk! Now I rarely get the chance for a good night out and can't remember the last time I even had a drink. Children change you! The last time I was out I had a great time but had it sober. No I wasn't driving but the fault of a hungover with two screaming children put me right off lol. 

If we are not acting somehow not ourselves then we are trying to change something about ourselves! I know this is something most woman can relate to, Men to I agree but being a woman I know that at sometime through our life's maybe it's once a month when we have a period or in our teenage years we discover something we don't like or just fell could use a little improvement. Being someone with OCD this is something easy for me to say yer I really can relate to that. I honestly spent half if not 3/4 of my 26 years trying to change or better something about myself. At the age of 12 I did in fact end up in hospital, My OCD was hard and I was having some food issues ( silly ways I tyred to stay thin ) that it all become to much and I took a lot of pills, panicked and ended up having to tell all to a councillor:( I try to always tell my princess how pretty and perfect she is ) I tell both my kids you are who you are never hide from it or be ashamed of who you are. I need to tell my son this often. Having Aspergers ( A type of autism on the autistic spectrum ) Other children have been known to be nasty taking the mick out his love of trains and buses. Maybe it's lucky he has this obsessed interest as a child with ASD because he does not become as upset about these remakes as would his sister or any other child that is not on the spectrum. 

Next time you have something important to attend someone to meet who needs impressing then tell yourself that today I'm going to be me. I bet this way thinks will go a whole lot smoother. TRUST ME.

The gift of memory

Memory, One of the most important tools us as human being need.

Well with out the memory we would be completely lost. Today I was watching one of my favorite films. 50 first dates staring Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore. A very funny but interesting film, that I must admit gets you thinking what if! In this romantic comedy Lucy ( Drew Barrymore ) has had a car crash the result unfortunately is that she suffers short -term memory loss. When Henry ( Adam Sandler ) falls for her he is unaware of her condition. They arrange to have breakfast the next morning, but when he turns up and tries to talk to her she freaks out. The thing is Lucy remembers everything up In to the night before the accident but nothing after that as when she sleeps the days events get wiped from her memory. Every single day Henry has to go to amazing lengths to make Lucy fall in love with him all over again. Well to cut a long story short. Henry makes Lucy a video tape that she has to watch every morning when she wakes up just so she knows who he is, what day it is, and what's been happening in her life since she lost her memory. After a number of ups and downs amazingly they go on to marry and have a child.

I know that this is a film I'm chatting on about! But it is something that happens in peoples lives. We do take things for grunted. The memory is used over and over it's the mental capacity to store and later recall or recognize events, and boy do we need it. I'm always joking about how I'm losing it. You know as a busy mum it's easy to forget stuff! I'm always forgetting where it is I put the keys or having to run back in doors to check that yes in fact I did switch of the washing machine or what not. To really lose my memory is not a nice fault and I really hope that never happens to me. 

Some people say that they have a photographic memory but in my opinion this statement isn't completely true. How can a photo album be the same. Memories are rarely exact copies of earlier experiences, they can be pretty close but exact no. There are people in this world that have a great memory. A lot of these people I have found have some form of developmental disorder such as autism or Asperger's they have this ability to use there memory in a very amazing way, some being able to remember long sets of numbers or the order of subjects. My son has Asperger's he is already showing some incredible skills that involve his memory and the way in which he can use it. G has an ongoing interest with trains and buses, apart from the love he has in discovering and learning how they work he also has the skill to remember where each one stops. There are hundreds of buses in London! G properly knows where 90% of these are going. The 10% he don't know I'm sure is only because he has not yet come across them. This is how it works! You tell G the number he then tells you where it start and finishes, I swear half these buses he has not yet been on but he has seen them for a short time and by looking at the information displayed on the front of the bus he has stored and retained the info for later use. If it's a train and he knows what line it is, he will go on to tell you all the stations on that one line. Pretty cool and totally has sod all to do with me as I have said my memory is rubbish so the condition must be the reason behind his amazing gift.

The collection of all memories that we hold is the library of our personal history. It builds into our story and our past memories can help us on our path in becoming what it is we want to be and later will become. 

We can always use ways to improve our memory but we can never control it as it is part of our brain and our brain is what controls us. As we age the changes in the way our memory works not only becomes visible to us but to others. It's all just part of the ageing process. So next time your granny don't remember you when you visit then don't worry as give it a week or two and she will be all over you the next time you visit telling you what a bonnie little baby you were.

So there we have it. This is the post made up from the result of a mum that has an interest in psychology having had a hour or two in her busy day to chill, kick back and enjoy a film. My husband asked me " why do you have to get all deep? why can't you just watch the bloody thing?" My Answer! That's just me! That's who I am.

If you want to read more about my little man G or learn more about ASD then you are welcome to visit my sister blog: A boy with Aspergers. 

A trip to the unknown

What in life are you most scared or worried about? Is it the outcome of a job interview or how your child will progress in school and life as a whole?

It all boils down to the same! We as a human being are most scared or worried of the unknown! 

I have sat and fault to myself more then once, many a times in fact, Once I have got past this or that I will be able to relax and not have anything left to worry about. But come on how true is this statement? Not very true! Why? Because life it's self is a worry! Its just how we manage to deal with these worries of everyday life. We can chose to let them get deep inside our heads making us sick with the unknown or we can chose to take each day as it comes. What kind of person are you?

Once you let to much in then that's when things change! That's when you see the world in a different way. That's when your at major risk of developing an Anxiety disorder. I'm not suggesting you go along life not worrying about a thing because not doing this would cause you to develop such a disorder. I'm just saying that once you start to ponder on the unknown in an obsessive way that's when you can be pretty much sure mental health problems are on the way. Stress and anxiety are hard to deal with, but how we deal with it is the key. It's very easy for me to sit here writing this post, but for me it is hard to put my own words in to actions. As a person that does not deal with anxiety in the best of ways I know how out of control Anxiety disorders can really become.

I spent many years battling the condition OCD. A condition that still bears it's big ugly head at times. There are two major subcategories of anxiety disorders: Phobic disorders and anxiety states. Well I seem to fall into the later, anxiety states covers's disorders such as panic disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, and post traumatic stress disorder. I'm unsure about post traumatic stress disorder, but OCD and panic disorder I can relate to on a number of levels having suffered both of them. Physiological arousal and free-floating anxiety are something that come with each and everyone of them disorders, and that is what makes them so hard to deal with and over come. For the people that don't know what I'm blurting on about, Psychological arousal is when there maybe changes in the heart rate, respiration, muscle tension, dizziness, tension, tremor, sweating and shaking, felling of wanting to be sick or being unable to sallow. Free-floating is the same as the above but with one added difference! The felling of not knowing why this is happening ( An intense apprehension with-out reason) If you explained these symptoms to a doctor I'm guessing you would be told that you had experienced a panic attack and it was likely due to some sort of anxiety disorder. I used to fell a complete prat once I understood what in fact was occurring. It got to the stage where I knew that yes this was a panic attack I was having and yes it would pass, but at the same time I still wanted to get help as I was sure I was dieing. The first panic attack is one of the worse as you really do think you are having a heart attack! Mine started as I fault I was unable to sallow and my airways were closing. Silly you may think. Try living through one then say that's silly. I have passed out three times due to panic attacks, although there much more under control now, they still pop up and say hello now and then.

Most of the time when I'm stressed out.

So there is just a small handful of reasons not to ponder on the unknown!

And as i have said before, I was just 7 when OCD took over my childhood. 

For more info on anxiety within children you can read my blog A boy with Asperger's 

THE POWER OF HYPNOSIS

What is it with the fascination of hypnosis?

Well for me it's the fact that one can have an apparent power over another's mind. In this it can change the way in which the person acts. Hypnosis named after the Greek god of sleep is a trip to the unknown. Would I ever take such a trip. I don't think I would, but I'm a person that never likes to say never!

 Sleep when you awake and I click my fingers you will run around flapping your arms like a chicken! Um no thank you. But did you know that some people just don't respond to the hypnotist where others will be very responsive to the same hypnotist. It's all to do with the state of mind the individual is in at the time of hypnosis! It's all about the state of awareness that's really all hypnosis is. If one is able to go into a state where they are imagining something that makes them totally relaxed then it is said that they are in a hypnotic state. The person in which has become hypnotized is the one with the given talent. Not the hypnotist for they are just a guild thought the journey of hypnosis.

ALL CHILDREN ARE AMAZING

WHY DO I LOVE ASPERER'S ?

Because Asperger's lives within my son and he lives within it.

His the most amazing boy I have ever meet! But as you know Aspergers or no aspergers all mums will say this about there own. I also have a little angel named Alice. She does not have the condition but they are both loved very much the same way. You hear so many mother today always saying how they wished there lives were different. How they wished there child could do this or that or wasn't this or that way! But why? All our children are different and each and everyone of them has there own amazing mind. Children are amazing little people. When I say children I mean each and every single one of them. Love your child for who they are, love them for being them!

Mental health, more common then you know.

The mind! By far one of the most powerful things we own.

It's up to us on how we use it, treat it, and see it. Think your crazy? Mark my words' you carry on thinking that way theirs a pretty big chance you will be.

As a young woman ( well I like to think so ) I have known and meet so many different people with some form of mental health problem. Some conditions that are just a passing by thing, like depression or a breakdown of some sort. Then there are the conditions that well stick around like bipolar, paranoid disorders or schizophrenic disorders. It is so common now that nearly everyone will go through some form of mental health problem in the course of there life. 

I myself have seen what it can be like suffering OCD and panic attacks when growing up. I also hit some real lows when I was suffering from depression ( something I try hard to avoid ) 

My partner has ADHD and my son is on the autistic spectrum with Aspergers. 

Maybe for these reasons and others I have developed an interest in psychology. For sometime now I have been thinking of studying psychology as I enjoy it so much on many levels, but being a mother I just can't seem to find the time right now. A pretty rubbish excuse I know because I myself do firmly believe that if you really want something in your life you have to work at it to make it possible. So I'm hoping to take this chance in the near future' maybe next year! God only knows I spend anoth time reading about it I may as well study it. However there is something that I'm hoping to be able to start very soon! I have applied to be a volunteer for a local autism project. This well really give me the chance to get heard and raise awareness and funds for a cause very close to my heart. I will be involved in organising fundraising events and have one to one contact with other parents that have just found out there child is on the autistic spectrum. I have also been asked to become a founding member for a new online forum for ASD. This is due to Begin in April. This will also give me the chance to start conversations and answer questions from other parents that have just discovered there child has ASD. Really I can't wait. So really I have this and my family so that is going to keep me busy and on my toes for sometime.

Lets just say my mind will be worked and that's the way it should be.

MODEL ME KIDS

IT'S ALL IN THE NAME

Great I have now created a blogspot blog, and looking forward to using it.
First let me explain why I decided to name the blog Don't look twice! Well as this blog is focused around different aspects of physiology and the interest I have developed with the mind and mental health, I wanted to give it a name that I can really relate to. Don't look twice is that name! As a young child growing up I developed a condition known to many. OCD.
This was something that my son who is on the autistic spectrum can also relate to. All through he has a much milder form which I guess is really part of the Aspergers. Well I had and suppose still do a great fear of fire. I used to find myself up and down of a night unable to sleep as I felt the need to repeatedly check and count the plug sockets. It used to kill me having to leave the freezer plugged in and after the 8th trip back downstairs I would make the decision to unplug it.
God as you can probably guess I would make my mother crazy. I remember her begging me to not get up and do it. She would give it all she had trying to explain to me that the freezer was designed to be plugged in. I would get in bed and prey I fell asleep before she came up to bed but if I didn't them I would not be able to help the compulsion within me' yes I would unplug it yet again. My poor mum was forever replacing the defrosted food! It must of cost her a small fortune. I had many trips to the doctor and went through loads of therapies but it only seemed to get better in adulthood. It only really shows itself when I'm down or really stressed. Yes I still do the small things but on the whole it's under control.

So you see don't look twice is something I would tell myself when I felt the need to act out my compulsions. I guess it's the would that helped me onto that big old road to recovery, that many of us know for different reason. So OCD will be just one of the many subjects touched on within this blog, ASD, depression and eating disorders are just a few more. I do hope you will all follow me in the journey of the creation of what I hope to be a wonderful blog' DON'T LOOK TWICE.